Ask for More

10 Questions to Negotiate Anything

By: Alexandra Carter

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Paperback | 4 January 2022

At a Glance

Paperback
272 Pages

Dimensions(cm)
21.59 x 13.97 x 1.91

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Negotiation is a key skill for your job, your closest relationships, and even your everyday life, but often people shy away from it, feeling like they’re marching into battle or that they’re settling for less. Enter Alexandra Carter, Clinical Professor of Law and Director of the Mediation Program at Columbia University, NYC, who has taught students, business professionals and even the United Nations for more than a decade on this very topic. In Ask for More: Ten Questions to Improve Your Negotiations, Your Relationships and Your Life, Carter brings her breadth of knowledge to help anyone, regardless of their situation, ask for - and get - more.

Rather than adhering to the popular narrative that only the loudest and most assertive among us get what they want, Carter invites readers to rethink negotiation entirely. Through asking open-ended questions rather than panicked ones, you’ll be better able to steer a conversation, a negotiation, and ultimately a relationship for long-term success. She teaches a simple, yet powerful, ten-question framework for successful negotiation. The first five questions are the ones you first need to ask yourself (called 'mirror' questions) and the last five are the ones you ask who you’re negotiating with (called 'window' questions). The responses to such questions as "what’s brought me here?", "how do I feel?" and "what do I need?" will pave the way for a productive conversation based on values and needs. Carter’s method helps readers go far beyond one “yes” or handshake to create value that lasts a lifetime.

Accessible, powerful, and inspiring, Ask for More gives readers the tools to bring clarity and perspective to any important discussion.

Industry Reviews

"Most of us approach negotiation with a mix of fear and confusion. Now comes Ask for More to our rescue. With stunning clarity, Carter walks us through ten questions that will help us calm our emotions, clarify our goals, and steer our relationships with confidence and grace. Carter's conversational tone, gift for metaphor, and empathy for life's predicaments makes it a joy to read." -Douglas Stone and Sheila Heen, authors of Difficult Conversations and Thanks for the Feedback "Many people have a binary way of thinking about what they get in life: they get stuck between either a "polite yes" or a "rude no". They forget there is a third alternative: to negotiate. This is brilliantly illustrated in Ask for More by Alex Carter." -Greg McKeown, author of the New York Times bestseller Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit of Less "Reading Alexandra Carter feels like having a negotiation coach in your corner, encouraging you to think creatively and giving you the courage to ask for more." -Linda Babcock, author of Women Don't Ask and Ask for It "Guided by a simple ten-question framework and filled with powerful stories of real-life change, Ask For More empowers men and women to ask for what they want (and actually get it). This book is a must-read for any professional looking to create stronger, mutually-beneficial relationships at home or in the office." -Kathryn Minshew, CEO of The Muse and bestselling author of The New Rules of Work "An immediately actionable resource for getting the results you want-and building better relationships along the way." -Adam Grant, author of Give and Take and Originals

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