Behind the Facemask - A Gritty Memoir of Trauma, Addiction, Anger, Fatherhood, and Redemption
By Anthony James Hodel
Raw, unfiltered, and ultimately hopeful, Behind the Facemask is a survivor's memoir and a practical field guide for anyone rebuilding after childhood trauma, addiction, rage, and high-conflict relationships. Anthony James Hodel takes you inside the "circus life" years-fast money, faster mistakes-and into the quiet, ordinary work of repair: learning to regulate anger, co-parent without drama, show up for kids, and live with integrity on the days without applause.
Part confession, part playbook, the book weaves street-level stories with short notes from psychologist Dr. Dwyer on trauma, attachment, anger, and repair. Hodel speaks directly to men's mental health and fatherhood: how shame hides, how anger becomes a drug, how dopamine drives the next bad decision-and how exercise, service, accountability, and steady routines create sustainable highs that heal instead of harm.
What readers get inside
• Survivor's truth: candid scenes of abuse, addiction, courtrooms, and consequences-told with compassion, not excuses.
• Fatherhood, real life: love across distance, co-parenting in conflict, and the long work of earning trust back.
• Tools that work: boundaries that hold, repair scripts, emotional regulation, "parallel-parenting" moves that lower heat.
• A psychologist's lens (Dr. Dwyer): why the brain chases relief, what attachment injuries do to adults, and how to repair safely.
• The dopamine chapter: shifting from destructive "hits" (sex, steroids, anger) to sustainable chemistry (training, breath work, service, routine).
• The turning point: "When I Chose Calm"-choosing outcome over ego and proving change under pressure.
Perfect for readers who...
• are healing from childhood trauma or navigating addiction recovery
• want anger management that's practical, not preachy
• are co-parenting or rebuilding trust with kids and partners
• prefer a gritty voice that still delivers concrete, repeatable steps
Benefits you can use today
• Plain-language strategies to de-escalate, apologize well, and set clean boundaries
• A "dopamine menu" to replace destructive habits with training, service, and structure
• Small, repeatable routines that turn intent into trust-one Tuesday at a time
Positioning & comps
Memoir • Men's Mental Health • Substance Abuse & Recovery • Parenting & Co-Parenting • Anger Management • Trauma & Attachment. Readers of The Body Keeps the Score, Can't Hurt Me, Greenlights, and Atomic Habits will recognize the blend of story, science-lite, and actionable steps.
Content note
Includes references to abuse, addiction, anger, and legal conflict. Offers personal experience and practical ideas; not a substitute for professional care.
Quick answers
Q: Is this a self-help book or memoir?
A: Both-a true story with practical tools you can use.
Q: Does it include anger management strategies?
A: Yes-de-escalation, repair scripts, boundaries, and routines.
Q: Is there a psychologist's perspective?
A: Brief notes from Dr. Dwyer explain trauma, attachment, and repair.
Q: What makes it different?
A: Gritty honesty + clear steps (including a dopamine chapter) you can apply today.
Take the mask off. Keep it off. Start again.