29 Rules for Smart Parenting

Preface: Parenting requires substance and underpinning
Rule 1: When you feel your child or adolescent is âdifficultâ, before reacting out of anger or disappointment, go back to the source of your love!
Rule 2: When confronted with violence â" show no fear. Meet and defuse it by projecting a controlled presence!
Rule 3: If you feel the need to impose sanctions or punishment, first perform a âculpabilityâ check. Keep the level of punishment low in relation to the damages suffered!
Rule 4: Live by the values you want your child to commit to in life!
Rule 5: Donât just give an adequate response, have quid pro quo exchanges!
Rule 6: Always look for the impression behind the expression!
Rule 7: Surprise with an unexpected reaction!
Rule 8: Respond with level-headedness and always be consequential!
Rule 9: Create emotions if they have grown cold!
Rule 10: Direct parenting measures at the behavior, not at the person!
Rule 11: Practice consistency in child rearing!
Rule 12: Exercise your âparental privilegeâ â" the key to effective parenting!
Rule 13: Put your child rearing practices under the âmacroscopeâ and learn what is preventing your children from doing their homework!
Rule 14: Control the amount of time your child is exposed to television and computers!
Rule 15: Donât get forced into buying something just to avoid embarrassment!
Rule 16: If you are frustrated, take time alone with your parenting principles and see the reflection in the mirror!
Rule 17: Never forget: What bothers you is not your childâs behavior, but rather your interpretation of that behavior!
Rule 18: Ask questions that cause them to think â" not interrogations that lead to predetermined conclusions! Practice the art of âactive listening!â
Rule 19: Always address every level of a child rearing problem!
Rule 20: Use the BARE essentials: Bonding, Active involvement, Respect for boundaries, and Education!
Rule 21: Make your child the center of attention from time to time! Love is vital!
Rule 22: Improve the hidden learning influences in your childâs environment!
Rule 23: Give your children some space: a little distance can bring you closer!
Rule 24: Teach your child self-discipline by looking beyond your fears and idealistic views!
Rule 25: Avoid going down the âdead endsâ of child rearing!
Rule 26: Practice 2-way conversations!
Rule 27: Escape from self-expectations and enjoy the diversity of the world!
Rule 28: Provide encouragement, avoid disciplining!
Rule 29: Avoid overreaction or apologize for it!
Epilogue: The way out of the parenting doldrums
References