
The Forgiveness Solution
The Whole-Body RX for Finding True Happiness, Abundant Love, and Inner Peace
By:Ā Philip H. Friedman
Paperback | 1 January 2010
At a Glance
272 Pages
20.5 x 7 x 2
Paperback
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How To Forgive Yourself, Others, and Enjoy the Life You Deserve
The Forgiveness Solution is an interpersonal guide that will teach you to find joy and happiness in the journey of forgiveness. Rediscover who you are and transform into the best version of yourself through this simple yet profound process.
The root of almost all emotional problems is unforgiveness. Unforgiveness includes grievances, judgments, and attack thoughts towards others, ourselves, and our circumstances. The Forgiveness Solution is an easy to learn, practical and integrative process whereby you learn to shift and release your perceptions, attitudes, images, energy, and distressing feelings (anger, guilt, hurt, shame, anxiety, panic, trauma, etc.) and simultaneously re-empower yourself by choosing and deciding to forgive.
New solutions to problems that impact your emotional health. Dr. Friedman introduces you to the new, highly effective healing techniques of Transformational Forgiveness and Energetic Forgiveness. Packed within this book are powerful exercises, tools, and techniques that show you exactly how to forgive rather than just talking about forgiveness.
The Forgiveness Solution shows you how to:
- Feel an authentic sense of peace and contentment
- Change your viewpoint of any situation
- Take control of your emotional response to the events happening around you
- Connect with your inner wellbeing and grow into the best version of yourself
If you enjoyed books such as Awakening in the Dream, The Gift of Forgiveness, or The Book of Forgiving, then you'll want to read The Forgiveness Solution.
Industry Reviews
The Forgiveness Solution is a treasure-trove of inspiring quotations, powerful examples from Friedman's clinical practice, and numerous effective and healing exercises that bring the material alive. Whatever your orientation, you will find doors to walk through and abundant resources to continue your journey toward greater peace, happiness, love, and joy. --Martha Crampton, Ph.D., founder and former director of the Canadian Institute of Psychosynthesis in Montreal-- "Reviews"
The Forgiveness Solution is a wonderful, passionate, healing book that is easy to read, practical, integrative, and powerful. Readers will not only learn how to forgive themselves and others but will also be on the way to developing a forgiving personality and reconnecting with the inner goodness and light within themselves and each other. Gerald G. Jampolsky, M.D., author of Love Is Letting Go of Fear and co-author of A Mini Course for Life-- "Reviews"
The Forgiveness Solution is a wonderfully healing book, an inspiring and practical guide that assists individuals on working through the rigorous task of releasing even the darkest of emotions. --Caroline Myss, author of Defy Gravity and Anatomy of the Spirit-- "Reviews"
The Forgiveness Solution makes two bold claims -- that unforgiveness underlies virtually all psychological problems, and the solution to that underlying problem (and also other problems) is to forgive. Philip H. Friedman, equipped by years of practical psychotherapy experience, offers you a practical, powerful, and personal book that will help you forgive. Doable exercises are engaging, useful, and therapy-tested. While many psychologists integrate scientific findings into their practice, I know of no therapist who does as often as Friedman. His integration of research and practice has resulted in a book that will help you, teach you, and heal you. It is the best blend of science and clinical practice. --Everett L. Worthington, Jr., Ph.D., Professor of Psychology at Virginia Commonwealth University and author of Forgiving and Reconciling: Bridges to Wholeness and Hope-- "Reviews"
A comprehensive and powerful book that teaches hurt people to recover their center and let go of painful wounds and grievances. Fred Luskin, PhD, Director, Stanford Forgiveness Projects, and author of Forgive for Good-- "Reviews"
An amazing contribution to the field that draws upon scientific research, clinical experience, spiritual wisdom, and cutting-edge methods. Keeping this resource handy will help anyone navigate the toughest of times. --Fred P. Gallo, PhD, author of Energy Psychology and Energy Tapping for Trauma-- "Reviews"
Dr. Friedman's years of study and practical application of his deep knowledge, along with his obvious grace in dealing with this most sensitive and significant psychological problem, will inform and inspire you to new freedom from unforgiveness. Unforgiveness runs deep in all of us; it is ingrained in our childhood and highly reinforced in our society. The Forgiveness Solution will help you enormously, both personally and with your clients who suffer silently with this debilitating problem of how to become free through forgiveness. This book is a treasure and is well suited for laypersons as well as for professional practitioners. --Larry P. Nims, PhD, author of the BE SET FREE FAST(TM) book and DVD-- "Reviews"
Dr. Phil Friedman's The Forgiveness Solution draws upon extensive knowledge of contemporary forgiveness research, and then charts new territory by fusing that research with a deeply spiritual orientation. It offers a veritable goldmine of practical exercises drawn from years of guiding therapeutic clients into the experience of forgiveness. Friedman's profound commitment to helping his clients and his readers along the road to true forgiveness shines through on every page. If you are serious about walking on that road yourself, read this book and use it. Robert Perry, Founder of the Circle of Atonement and author of Path of Light and Signs: A New Approach to Coincidence, Synchronicity, Guidance, Life Purpose, and God's Plan-- "Reviews"
Forgiveness is quite possibly one of the most misunderstood words in the dictionary. We've all been told we 'should' forgive, but why is it so important and so difficult to do? Dr. Friedman's book answers these questions. Not only does he point to the benefits of forgiveness for your own health and inner peace, he gives you numerous ways to actually forgive and release the pain, hurt, guilt, and anger. World peace begins with inner peace; you owe it to yourself and the planet to read this book. --Mary T. Sise, LCSW, former president of the Association of Comprehensive Energy Psychology and co-author of The Energy of Belief: Psychology's Power Tools to Focus Intention & Release Blocking Beliefs-- "Reviews"
I opened this book and could not stop reading it! If you want to give up guilt, suffering, or painful distance from loved ones who have disappointed or hurt you, definitely get yourself a copy of The Forgiveness Solution. This is the most practical book you can buy on forgiveness. It can help you restore your own peace and happiness and make a rapid 180 degree turn in healing the most important relationships in your life! --Diana Kirschner, Ph.D., author of Love in 90 Days: The Essential Guide to Finding Your Own True Love
-- "Reviews"
If you want more peace, satisfaction, and joy in your life, then The Forgiveness Solution can be your solution. This book will not only change your life, it will change the world you live in. You can't afford the luxury of being unforgiving. --Stevan Thayer, Director of the Center of Being and author of Interview with an Angel-- "Reviews"
If you were to have one book on the all-important subject of forgiveness, this is the one. In an easy-to-read style, The Forgiveness Solution deftly compiles research with exercises, case studies with concise insights. It's a clear handbook on how to forgive, written for the lay person and professional alike. It also uses some of Dr. Friedman's own powerful techniques for dealing with forgiveness. To have a great life, you need to know how to forgive. This book really maps out what you need in a fascinating and comprehensive way. --Dr. Phillip Mountrose, co-author of The Heart & Soul of EFT and Beyond and co-director the Awakenings Institute-- "Reviews"
The most practical book I've ever read on forgiveness. From beginning to end, it focuses on giving you a direct experience of forgiveness and helps you to incorporate this way of being into every facet of your life. If you do the exercises in this book, I know your life will be changed forever. David Paul Doyle, co-author of The Voice for Love: Accessing Your Inner Voice to Fulfill Your Life's Purpose-- "Reviews"
There are many solutions to personal, social, and interpersonal problems, but The Forgiveness Solution is one of the best. With empathy, care, wisdom, and intuition, Dr Friedman gives you a detailed, step-by-step, and focused approach to healing, wholeness, peace, and happiness. Drawing on scientific research, spiritual teachings, and years of clinical experience, he teaches you how to forgive yourself and others. --Dr. Loren Toussaint, associate professor at Luther College-- "Reviews"
There is no doubt that the #1 solution to so many of our personal, political, and social problems today is forgiveness. In this book Dr. Friedman offers a wealth of forgiveness techniques and processes that skillfully blends science, spirituality, and clinical practice into a seamless garment of love, peace, strength, and resilience. Colin Tipping, author of Radical Forgiveness-- "Reviews"
Wow, what a rich and comprehensive resource The Forgiveness Solution is. Though the theme is 'forgiveness', Dr. Friedman offers us a rich resource to guide us to a positive, fulfilling, and satisfying life. Not only does he present us with a compendium of ways to perceive, assess, and take action to heal ourselves, but he even provides the questions and answers we might ask him to have the confidence to apply these methods. This is a book we could all use. --Barry G. Ginsberg, PhD, Director of The Center of Relationship Enhancement and author of Relationship Enhancement Family Therapy and 50 Wonderful Ways to Be a Single-Parent Family-- "Reviews"
| Introduction | p. 1 |
| What is Forgiveness? | p. 1 |
| Who Will Benefit from This Book? | p. 3 |
| How to Use This Workbook | p. 4 |
| Do You Work Better Alone or with Someone Else | p. 5 |
| What Are Some of the Major Benefits of Forgiving? | p. 6 |
| Forgiveness and Health | p. 6 |
| Forgiveness in Marriage | p. 7 |
| Over the Long Term | p. 7 |
| "But What If I Have Blocks or Resistances?" | p. 10 |
| Where Are You Now? Some Basic Self-Assessments | p. 11 |
| Assessing Where You Are | p. 14 |
| Exercise Checklists | p. 14 |
| Distress Checklist | p. 14 |
| Well-Being Checklist | p. 15 |
| Summary of Relationship between Forgiveness, Beliefs, and Emotions and Well-Being | p. 16 |
| Subjective Happiness Scale (SHS) | p. 17 |
| Satisfaction with Life Scale (SWLS) | p. 18 |
| The Gratitude Questionnaire (GQ6) | p. 19 |
| How Forgiving Are You? | p. 20 |
| The Heartland Forgiveness Scale (HFS) | p. 20 |
| Heartland Forgiveness Scale Self-Scoring and Interpretation | p. 22 |
| Summary of Scores: Initial Assessment Scoring | p. 26 |
| Identifying Who You Feel Has Harmed You | p. 27 |
| Exercise: Who Did Something within the Past Year That Hurt or Harmed You? | p. 30 |
| Journaling Experience 1: Last Year | p. 31 |
| Journaling Experience 2: Earlier in Life | p. 31 |
| Journaling Experience 3: Yourself | p. 32 |
| Using Affirmations | p. 32 |
| Exercise: Affirmations 1 and 2 | p. 33 |
| Exercise: Journaling Positive Benefits of Experiences 1-3 | p. 33 |
| Keep on Journaling | p. 34 |
| Discovering What Hurts: One Core Problem (Unforgiveness) and One Core Solution (Forgiveness) | p. 35 |
| One Core Problem, One Core Solution | p. 37 |
| Exercise: Identifying Your Grievances and Attack Thoughts | p. 39 |
| Choosing Love over Fear | p. 42 |
| Forgiveness Is a Bridge | p. 44 |
| The Two Paths | p. 45 |
| Happiness Is Found in the Present | p. 46 |
| Shoulding on Ourselves | p. 46 |
| Exercise: Affirmations 3 to 7 | p. 48 |
| From Fear to Love | p. 49 |
| Identifying Stressors | p. 50 |
| Exercise: Stressors | p. 50 |
| Disappointment Stressors | p. 51 |
| Expectational Stressors | p. 51 |
| Discovering Your Old Films and Old Tapes | p. 52 |
| Exercise: How Stressful Are Your Old Films and Tapes? | p. 53 |
| Old Tape Stressors | p. 53 |
| How Are Your Old Tapes Clouding How You See Others? | p. 54 |
| Exercise: Releasing Yourself from Past Mistakes | p. 55 |
| Seeing Beyond Judgment and Blame: The Path of Transformational Forgiveness | p. 57 |
| Toward Transformational Forgiveness | p. 59 |
| Looking beneath the Anger | p. 60 |
| Releasing Yourself from Four Key Words That Undermine Forgiveness | p. 61 |
| Setting an Intention, Having Willingness | p. 62 |
| Listening to the Voice of Love, Not Fear | p. 62 |
| Thorny and Nurturing Teachers | p. 63 |
| Discovering What You Don't Want and What You Do: The Process of Setting Goals | p. 65 |
| The Magic Wand and Miracle Goals | p. 67 |
| Exercise: What You Don't Want | p. 68 |
| Exercise: What You Do Want | p. 68 |
| Exercise: Psychological Uplifter 1 | p. 69 |
| Knowing When to Let Go | p. 71 |
| Exercise: Teaching Stories | p. 74 |
| The Alligator and Holding On | p. 74 |
| The Two Monks and Letting Go | p. 74 |
| The Rat and Cheese Story: Discovering Alternatives | p. 75 |
| Pink and White Doors: Choice and Empowerment | p. 76 |
| Exercise: A Fist and Releasing | p. 78 |
| Thirty Useful Affirmations | p. 78 |
| Making New Choices through Relaxation, Imagery, and Forgiveness Afformations | p. 84 |
| Exercise: Relaxation and the Inner Sanctuary | p. 87 |
| Exercise: Imagery of Seeds and Weeds | p. 89 |
| Exercise: Opening the Way for Change | p. 91 |
| Exercise: Preprogramming Yourself for Forgiveness | p. 93 |
| Exercise: Future Self | p. 94 |
| Afformations | p. 95 |
| Exercise: Eleven Forgiveness Afformations | p. 95 |
| Energetic Forgiveness and Releasing: Positive Pressure Point Techniques 1-4 | p. 98 |
| Positive Pressure Point Technique Level 1: Use of Pressure Points and Tapping with No Affirmations (PPPT-L1) | p. 101 |
| Psychological Uplifter 2 | p. 103 |
| Positive Pressure Point Technique Level 2: Pressure Points with Holding and Breathing with No Affirmations (PPPT-L2) | p. 107 |
| Positive Pressure Point Technique Level 3: Pressure Points with Tapping, Holding, and Breathing with No Affirmations (PPPT-L3) | p. 109 |
| Three Frames of Reference, Analogies, or Metaphors | p. 110 |
| Positive Pressure Point Technique Level 4: Pressure Points with Tapping, Holding, and Breathing with Affirmations (PPPT-L4) | p. 112 |
| Troubleshooting | p. 115 |
| Energetic Forgiveness and Finding Peace: Positive Pressure Point Techniques 5-8 | p. 120 |
| Positive Pressure Point Technique Level 5: Use of Pressure Points with Tapping, Holding, and Breathing with Forgiveness Affirmations (PPPT-L5) | p. 122 |
| Forgiveness Affirmations | p. 123 |
| Positive Pressure Point Technique Level 6: Pressure Points, Tapping, Holding, and Breathing and Reporting on Internal Experiences with No Affirmations (PPPT-L6) | p. 125 |
| Positive Pressure Point Technique Level 7: Use of Pressure Points and Extensive Imagery (PPPT-L7) | p. 127 |
| Positive Pressure Point Technique Level 8: Use of Pressure Points, Holding, and Unforgiveness and Forgiveness Affirmations (PPPT-L8) | p. 129 |
| Four Powerful Forgiveness Imagery Techniques | p. 134 |
| Forgiveness Imagery Exercises | p. 136 |
| Creating Well-Being Forgiveness Imagery Process | p. 137 |
| Light Imagery Grateful Heart Technique (LIGHT) | p. 140 |
| White Light Self-Forgiveness Exercise | p. 142 |
| HEaling And Release Technique (HEART) | p. 146 |
| Practicing Forgiveness in Relationship Conflicts | p. 150 |
| Empty Chair Exercise | p. 152 |
| Exercise: Violet Transmuting Flame Imagery | p. 155 |
| Ho'oponopono Forgiveness Exercise | p. 157 |
| Reconnecting with Your Inner Treasure | p. 161 |
| Letter-Writing Exercise: Forgiving an Important Relationship | p. 164 |
| Exercise: Giving and Receiving Forgiveness and Miracles | p. 171 |
| Exercise: Fountain of Forgiveness and Love | p. 173 |
| Transformational Forgiveness and Cutting the Energetic Cord | p. 178 |
| Exercise: Transformational Forgiveness | p. 180 |
| Composite Forgiveness Imagery Exercise | p. 182 |
| Exercise: Cutting the Energetic Cord and Forgiving Imagery Process | p. 186 |
| Reconnecting with Your Divine Self | p. 191 |
| Exercise: Gift of Forgiveness Imagery Process | p. 194 |
| Radical Forgiveness | p. 197 |
| Exercise: Four Written Steps to Radical Forgiveness | p. 199 |
| Exercise: Radical Forgiveness Written Release Letter | p. 202 |
| Exercise: The Circle of Love Forgiveness Process | p. 204 |
| Self-Assessment Revisited | p. 209 |
| Summary of April's Scores | p. 210 |
| Twelve Frequently Asked Questions and Their Answers | p. 214 |
| False and True Forgiveness | p. 214 |
| Wrong, Bad, and Evil | p. 216 |
| Cheating | p. 217 |
| Why Should I Forgive? | p. 218 |
| Acceptance, Tolerance, or Forgiveness | p. 219 |
| Hitler, Bin Laden, and Hussein | p. 219 |
| Perpetrators and Victims | p. 220 |
| A Different Perspective from Other Authors | p. 221 |
| Forgiveness, Love, Gratitude, and Grace | p. 221 |
| How Often Should I Forgive? | p. 222 |
| Forgiveness and Assertiveness | p. 223 |
| Forgiveness, Awakening, Oneness, Salvation, and Enlightenment | p. 224 |
| Review, Recommendations, and Returning Home | p. 225 |
| Summary Pointers, Recommendations, and Practices to. Help You Arrive Home to Your True, Authentic Self, Using the Forgiveness Solution | p. 225 |
| Forgiveness Solution Brief Worksheet | p. 226 |
| Twelve Follow-Up Exercises and Practices | p. 230 |
| Notes | p. 233 |
| Recommended Reading | p. 237 |
| Forgiveness-Related Books | p. 237 |
| Energy Healing-Related Books | p. 238 |
| Professional Reading List | p. 238 |
| Recommended Resources | p. 245 |
| Acknowledgments | p. 248 |
| Table of Contents provided by Ingram. All Rights Reserved. |
ISBN: 9781573244626
ISBN-10: 1573244627
Published: 1st January 2010
Format: Paperback
Language: English
Number of Pages: 272
Audience: General Adult
Publisher: Turner Publishing Company
Country of Publication: US
Dimensions (cm): 20.5 x 7 x 2
Weight (kg): 0.37
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