Captains Outrageous

By: Joe R. Lansdale

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Hardcover | 1 September 2001

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Hap Collins is stuck in a bit of a mid-life rut. Spending his days guarding the local poultry plant, he doesn't look forward to going home to his lady Brett, with whom making love has become like twice-ground hamburger without the fixings. Suddenly, a spontaneous, off-duty act of rescue earns Hap and his best friend Leonard Pine a cruise down the Gulf of Mexico to the Caribbean. But their holiday is short-lived, thanks to a shipboard eruption of Leonard's proud, hot temper. Stranded with Hap in Mexico, Leonard buys an ugly hat, gets stabbed by a thug cop, and is saved from armed desperadoes by a geriatric fisherman and his gorgeous daughter.
Then things get dangerous.
On frighteningly foreign turf, Hap and Leonard wade through a cast bigger than the U.S. army, including a nudist mobster, his seven-foot enforcer, and a hog-raising private eye. Getting way too close to high-echelon corruption and murder, they will find a parcel of trouble following them everywhere. And along the way Leonard may even buy a new hat.

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