Pretend They Are Dead

A Father's Search for the Truth

By: Steven Scott Eichenblatt

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Paperback | 10 June 2025

At a Glance

Paperback
358 Pages

Dimensions(cm)
21.59 x 13.97 x 2.03

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When Steven's dad, Allen, disappeared, he left behind more than his children-he left a legacy of loss and family secrets. Though working just miles away, Allen gave up his kids for adoption. He was soon replaced by another man, one with his own four children, whose strict rules and explosive temper made home a place of fear rather than refuge.

Steven spent decades wrestling with the wounds of abandonment and abuse, burying his pain so deep it became "the feeling of no feeling." A forced move to Florida, a brutal fist fight, and a grisly car crash pushed Steven to life's edge resulting in a move to Israel, where he discovered that "self-help" meant he would die a failure unless he learned to help himself.

Pretend They Are Dead is a gripping memoir of survival, trauma, and resilience-told with raw honesty, filmic detail, and defiant humor. Steven grew up rejected: Two men claimed to be his father but neither proved to be a dad. Determined not to repeat the past, he become an unwavering presence in the lives of his own five children. His story will both shock and inspire.

Industry Reviews

"Pretend They Are Dead is a compelling story of fathers and sons. As a former major leaguer, the Tug McGraw chapter brought back great memories of having a catch with my own dad and being the dad playing catch with my kids. Don't miss this one!"

-Mike Stanley, Retired MLB All-Star (1995)

"Beautifully written with immediacy and candor, Pretend They Are Dead sheds light on the long-lasting effects of parental estrangement, childhood trauma and the crucial role that empathy plays in forgiveness."

-Carol Bloomquist Mikulka, MD, American Board of Psychiatry and Neurology

"This book is a testament to courage and resilience in the face of abuse and neglect. It is ultimately a story of hope, that with persistence, determination and the right kind of help, healing and transformation is possible."

-Patricia Coughlin, Ph.D., Clinical Psychologist

"Pretend They Are Dead is a profoundly inspirational story of resilience, driven by Steven Eichenblatt's incredible determination to overcome the traumatic events of his past, which inspired him to focus on fatherhood, family, and serving others."

-Michael Nitti, Author of The Trophy Effect and Mastery: The Art of Living on Purpose

"Steve Eichenblatt has given readers an extraordinary gift: the language to express the unspeakable and the strength to uncover hope where it's hardest to find. Pretend They Are Dead offers a piercing, tender exploration of the unseen battles children endure when forced to navigate the chaos of adult struggles. With vivid storytelling and profound emotional insight, Eichenblatt reveals not just the lasting impact of these early wounds, but the quiet, powerful ways resilience takes root."

-Christine Wolf, author of Politics, Partnerships & Power and Founder of Write to Heal Workshops and Retreats

"Eichenblatt's storytelling voice is characterized by an oddly effective combination of urgency and morbid humor; he narrates his story almost entirely in the present tense, and his voice keeps the pages turning."

-Kirkus Reviews

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