
Moving Beyond Loss
Real Answers to Real Questions from Real People—Featuring the Proven Actions of The Grief Recovery Method
By: John W. James, Russell Friedman
Paperback | 16 December 2012
At a Glance
268 Pages
22.23 x 13.97 x 2.54
Paperback
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Industry Reviews
Just the right questions, just the right answers. A treasure trove of good advice for anyone suffering the pain of loss. -- Allen Frances, MD, DSM-IV Task Force; author of author of Saving Normal; professor emeritus, Duke University School of Medicine
No one, and I mean no one, knows as much about grief, loss, and how to recover from both than Russell Friedman and John W. James. The work they pioneered in The Grief Recovery Handbook saved my life in no uncertain terms, and surely they have saved countless other lives from either actual extinction or endless pain. If you are suffering, drowning, despairing in grief and loss, let this new book be your passage to peace. It will rescue you; I promise. -- Jim Beaver, star of Deadwood, Supernatural, and author of Life's That Way
My family has been fortunate enough to have direct guidance from Russell and John in dealing with the losses that have affected our lives. Moving Beyond Loss will help people become aware that recovery from loss is even possible, and that there's a practical Method that can help them. This book should be front and center in everyone's home as a reference book-an Emotional Google. -- Nick Searcy, actor, Justified
Grief is one of those uncharted territories that many dare not really explore deeply. Moving Beyond Loss combines practical guidance with clinical wisdom to provide a landscape which helps mourners better understand the journey through grief. -- Joanne Cacciatore, Ph.D, FT, MISS Foundation founder and assistant professor, Arizona State University
| Introduction | p. 1 |
| Beginning at the Beginning | p. 9 |
| Six Myths That Limit Us | p. 11 |
| MYTH: Grieve Alone: Q&A | p. 19 |
| My Husband Never Comes Out of the Bedroom | p. 20 |
| I Wonder Why I Have to Be All By Myself | p. 21 |
| Her Emotional Plate Is Way Beyond Pull | p. 23 |
| It's Not Advisable for Family Members to Do Grief Work Together | p. 25 |
| "Let Go" of What? and "Move On" to Where? | p. 26 |
| I'm Scared, but Will Do It Anyway | p. 28 |
| MYTH: It Just Takes Time: Q&A | p. 31 |
| The Pain Often Gets Worse within Time | p. 32 |
| Do We Ever Really Recover? | p. 34 |
| They Want Us Looking Good and Being Productive 3-5 Days Later! | p. 36 |
| Answering Questions Doesn't Resolve Grief | p. 37 |
| How Long until I'm Happy Again? | p. 39 |
| If You Move On, Are You Letting Go of Them? | p. 40 |
| I Have Morphed into Another Person; How Can I Recover? | p. 43 |
| When Is It Too Soon to Start Dating? | p. 45 |
| When Your Heart Is Broken Your Head Doesn't Work Right | p. 47 |
| MYTH: Be Strong for Others: Q&A | p. 49 |
| The Real Key Is for You to Go First | p. 50 |
| A Tangled Web of Losses! | p. 52 |
| It's Amazing How Disconnected We Can Feel | p. 54 |
| Saying "I Know How You Feel" Robs Dignity from a Griever | p. 56 |
| Grieving People Need to Talk about What Happened | p. 57 |
| Intervention Doesn't Work with The Grief Recovery Method® | p. 39 |
| I'm Getting Tired of Propping Everyone Else Up | p. 61 |
| All Relationships Are Unique | p. 63 |
| The Word "Imagine" Creates Safety | p. 65 |
| MYTH: Keep Busy and Short-Term Energy-Relieving Behaviors: Q&A | p. 67 |
| STERBs-What Are They? | p. 68 |
| Grief Is Exhausting! | p. 70 |
| How Do I Deal with the Anger I Feel? | p. 72 |
| Memorial Jewelry Doesn't Heal Your Heart | p. 74 |
| Keeping Busy Just Exhausts Us | p. 76 |
| You Can't Bypass Feelings, You Have to Go through Them | p. 78 |
| Part II The Ongoing Controversy: The Alleged Stages of Grief vs. Typical, Normal, and Natural Responses to Loss | p. 81 |
| Are There Actual Stages of Grief? | p. 83 |
| No Stages of Grief: Q&A | p. 87 |
| Statement of Death Is NOT Denial | p. 88 |
| Adapting to the Painful Reality of Death | p. 89 |
| Has the Reality of My Loss Set in Yet? | p. 90 |
| Your Broken Heart Talking! | p. 92 |
| He Won't See Me Graduate, Get Married, or Have Kids | p. 94 |
| I Desperately Need to Know How to Live Again | p. 96 |
| On Crying: Q&A | p. 97 |
| I Still Cry Daily. Is that Normal? | p. 98 |
| Force Myself to Cry to Make People Stop Worrying about Me? | p. 99 |
| Death of a Spouse Can Be Like Losing a Piece of Your Body | p. 101 |
| Feelings Don't Happen "Just Out of the Blue" | p. 103 |
| Very Attached to Their Possessions | p. 104 |
| Robbed of Goodbye: Q&A | p. 107 |
| Sudden Death Robs Us of a Last Goodbye | p. 108 |
| No Longer Together, but Still Heartbroken | p. 109 |
| Is There Such a Thing as Complicated Grief? | p. 110 |
| When I Need Him One More Time, He's No Longer Here | p. 112 |
| Relationships Are Made Up of Time and Intensity! | p. 115 |
| Missing the Funeral | p. 116 |
| Cremains as a Permanent Relocatable Grief Recovery Monument | p. 118 |
| Other Typical, Normal, and Natural Responses to Loss: Q&A | p. 121 |
| Quieting the Inner Dialogue That Never Sleeps | p. 122 |
| Life Itself Just Seems Very Tasteless-Nothing Seems to Matter | p. 124 |
| Inability to Concentrate Is an Almost Universal Reaction | p. 126 |
| Still Hurt and Angry | p. 127 |
| Will I Ever Feel Normal Again? | p. 129 |
| The Victims' Families Often Feel as if They Are on Trial | p. 130 |
| The Emotional Pink Elephant in the Living Room | p. 132 |
| Massive Reminders of Someone Who Is No Longer Alive | p. 134 |
| My Mom's Picture | p. 135 |
| Why Do Families Tear Apart? | p. 137 |
| PART III A Host of Questions on Unique Situations | p. 139 |
| Holidays, Anniversaries, and Reminders: Q&A | p. 141 |
| Today Is Way Too Long to Stay Stuck in One Feeling | p. 142 |
| Multiple Deaths Make Us Feel Like We're Drowning | p. 144 |
| The Holidays-A Perfect Time to Demonstrate the Truth to Your Children | p. 14s |
| It Is the Fact That He Died That Is Most Important, Not the Method or the Date | p. 147 |
| Resetting the Dysfunctional Default Settings to Create a Fuller Life | p. 149 |
| Things That Don't Get to Happen Because They're No Longer Here | p. 151 |
| Many Grieving People Struggle with Enjoying Themselves | p. 152 |
| Will I Ever Be Able to Stop Being Numb and Let Go? | p. 154 |
| Stuck on a Painful Image: Q&A | p. 157 |
| Staying Stuck on a Painful Image Keeps Us Stuck in Grief Tragic Deaths Compound Our Pain | p. 159 |
| Trying "Not" to Think about It Doesn't Work | p. 161 |
| Completion, Not Closure-An Important Distinction | p. 162 |
| Grief Is Not PTSD | p. 164 |
| We Know What They Would Have Said | p. 166 |
| As She Was Dying, My Mother Shut Me Out | p. 167 |
| I Know There's Nothing I Could've Done to Stop Him | p. 169 |
| Guilt and Blame: Q&A | p. 171 |
| The "Story-Line" Sometimes Trumps the "Heart-Line" | p. 172 |
| But for One Second Earlier or Later, Our Lives Are Changed Forever | p. 175 |
| How Do I Accept the Things I Did? | p. 177 |
| The Good, The Bad, and Sometimes, The Ugly | p. 179 |
| Sometimes We Have to Break Our Promises | p. 181 |
| Walking Through Life Without Your Mate | p. 183 |
| Left with Unfinished Emotional Business | p. 184 |
| Hamster on a Wheel | p. 186 |
| The Nursing Home Facility Mistreated My Mom | p. 188 |
| Death, Divorce, and Difficult Relationships: Q&A | p. 189 |
| On Being "Ruled from the Grave" | p. 190 |
| When the Last Interaction Was Negative | p. 191 |
| Confused and Overwhelmed by the Death of a Former Spouse | p. 193 |
| Discovery Does Not Equal Recovery | p. 196 |
| Families and Legal Mayhem | p. 199 |
| The "Warm and Fuzzies" That Never Happened | p. 200 |
| The Death of the Person Who Harmed You | p. 202 |
| Some Family Members Disassociate Themselves from Others After a Death | p. 204 |
| Losses of Safety and Trust-The Painful By-products of Spousal Abuse | p. 206 |
| Alcohol Can Leave a Trail of Destruction in Its Wake! | p. 208 |
| Rather Than Reconcile, Become as Emotionally Complete as Possible | p. 209 |
| Children: Q&A | p. 211 |
| Putting Together a Puzzle with Very Few Pieces | p. 212 |
| A Recurring Dream … After 58 Years | p. 213 |
| Missing People We Never Really Knew | p. 215 |
| My Daughter Wants to Take the Plane to Heaven to See Her Grandpa | p. 216 |
| "Monkey See, Monkey Do" | p. 217 |
| An Eleven-Year-Old's Upset Reactions to Questions about Death | p. 219 |
| Helping Children in Foster Care Deal with Multiple Losses | p. 221 |
| Explaining Death to Young Children and to a Child with Special Needs | p. 223 |
| Whether or Not to Take Children to Funerals or Memorials | p. 225 |
| Are Bedwetting and Grief Related? | p. 227 |
| Three Little Girls Ask When Daddy Will Be Home | p. 229 |
| Helping a Four-Year-Old Know Who His Mother Really Was | p. 230 |
| Going to Church Reminds a Twelve-Year-Old of His Dad's Death | p. 231 |
| In Closing | p. 235 |
| Articles Section | p. 237 |
| Time Doesn't Heal-Actions Do | p. 237 |
| On Crying-Part One | p. 240 |
| On Crying-Part Two | p. 242 |
| Normal and Natural Reactions to Death | p. 245 |
| Stuck on a Painful Image | p. 252 |
| About the Authors | p. 255 |
| Table of Contents provided by Ingram. All Rights Reserved. |
ISBN: 9781589797055
ISBN-10: 1589797051
Published: 16th December 2012
Format: Paperback
Language: English
Number of Pages: 268
Audience: General Adult
Publisher: ROWMAN & LITTLEFIELD
Country of Publication: GB
Dimensions (cm): 22.23 x 13.97 x 2.54
Weight (kg): 0.32
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- Non-FictionFamily & HealthCoping with / Advice about Personal, Social & Health TopicsCoping with / Advice about Death & Bereavement
- Non-FictionFamily & HealthCoping with / Advice about Personal, Social & Health TopicsCoping with / Advice about Illness & Specific Health Conditions
- Non-FictionSelf-Help, Personal Development & Practical AdvicePopular Psychology
























