Perfect for new mothers and mothers-to-be, this deeply personal and funny memoir from a beloved actress and storyteller reveals why motherhood isn’t just a new chapter in your life—it’s a metamorphosis.
As the creator of the witty humor account @ShawnatheMom that delights more than 4 million followers with her comedy skits, Shawna Lander knows what it’s like to play a lot of different roles. But before she ever took to the online “stage,” her role as a mom changed everything, not only about her life, but about her identity. Like many first-time mothers, she imagined her baby as a beautiful addition to her life—and instead found that every aspect of her world changed completely so that her new life could begin.
Through motherhood, Shawna was reborn. And in The Role of Mom Will Be Played By, she’s sharing her empowering, transformative journey for the first time.
Through candid anecdotes and humorous reflections, Shawna reveals how motherhood reshaped her identity, worldview, relationships, and understanding of human worth. She debunks the prettily romanticized version of motherhood, presenting it instead as a raw, challenging, and profoundly rewarding experience.
Central to this heartfelt book is the belief that every mother's journey is linked and, while there is no one-size-fits-all approach to parenting, the magnitude of the experience is universal. She captures the essence of motherhood as weird, gross, profound, mundane, and incredibly personal—all at once.
The Role of Mom Will Be Played By is a celebration of the resilience, love, and humor that defines motherhood. Shawna’s authentic voice and relatable experiences provide comfort and inspiration to anyone on the extraordinary journey of becoming a mom, offering wisdom, support, and a deep appreciation for the beautiful chaos.
About the Author
Shawna Lander is a Meisner-trained actor, writer, and content creator with a passion for sharing stories that bring people together. Through her hilarious and poignant viral skits, Shawna takes on relationships, motherhood, and family dynamics with a sincerity and vulnerability that has created a fiercely loyal audience of four million. In everything she does, Shawna strives to be entertaining, uplifting, and most of all, authentic. Shawna believes that it is through the honest sharing of our stories that we begin to realize how fundamentally connected we all are.
Industry Reviews
“What seems like a candid exploration of early motherhood is actually a front-row seat to the creative process. In these pages we witness a spark that leads to gestation, analysis, and breakthrough, showing us, with humor and heart, that mothers are creativity incarnate.”
—KC Davis (@DomesticBlisters), USA Today bestselling author of How to Keep House While Drowning
“Powerful, curious, and deeply human, this book captures the weird, liminal phase of pregnancy and postpartum so well it should be required reading for all fathers.”
—Liz Swenson (@LizSwensonBFF), author and illustrator of You Got This, Mama!, Raising Tiny Humans, and Trying
“Shawna Lander offers a candid and deeply personal account of how motherhood reshapes a woman’s inner world, drawing us into the intimate and often unspoken experience. Her writing reads with the ease of a conversation and the craft of a seasoned storyteller, inviting readers into her thoughts, grounding and reassuring them along the way. With an honesty that feels both intimate and universally recognizable, she gives language to the emotional shifts of early motherhood, allowing readers to feel seen and less alone. What a comfort this will be to new mothers.”
—Karen Kleiman, founder of The Postpartum Stress Center and author of Good Moms Have Scary Thoughts
“The Role of Mom Will Be Played By is as unflinchingly introspective as it is raw, funny, and hopeful. With her gift for human insight, Shawna Lander tells a story so personal it becomes universal, reminding us all that we are so much more than the roles we play.”
—Amber Estenson (@ThatMidwesternMom), actress, opera singer, and content creator
“Shawna Lander does something rare: she tells the truth about motherhood without making it a cautionary tale or a love letter. It’s both, and everything in between . . . Every mother who has ever felt behind, alone, or quietly certain she’s the only one getting it wrong will feel seen by this book. And every woman who’s wondered if motherhood is for her will find, somewhere in these pages, the most honest answer she’s ever been given.”
—Sidra Wali (@SidandListen), influencer
“This is not simply a story about being a mother; it is the voice of a woman sharing her lived experience with others who, regardless of if they have children, will recognize themselves in the layered, deeply personal, and yet totally universal reality of womanhood. It offers validation, reassurance, and a much-needed breath of relief for women at every stage of life. I can’t explain to you how much this book meant to me as a woman who is unsure if she wants children, and I know reading this will be such a defining moment for so many.”
—Sydney Jo (@ThatGirlSydJo), creator of viral web series The Group Chat
“The Role of Mom Will Be Played By is honestly so great. Sometimes changing your mind requires you to create a version of yourself that didn’t exist before. Shawna and this book are glowing examples of that transformation.”
—Soogia (@Soogia1), influencer
“A raw, honest, and vulnerable account of the journey to motherhood. Sensitively told by Shawna, it’s a book you will want to share not only with expectant mothers, but the tribe who surrounds her.”
—Dr. Maryhan, psychologist and host of the How Not to Screw Up Your Kids podcast
“Shawna Lander has given mothers both a mirror and a permission slip to be fully human. In taking us into her entry to motherhood, Shawna shows us that we are not alone, that we matter and that by choosing to be the main character in our own lives, we can better play the most sacred role of mom in our children’s lives. This is a book for the mom who feels like she disappeared the moment the baby came along and for anyone who ever side-eyed another mom just doing the best she can with what she knows. Lander’s story reminds us that, after all, moms are people, too.”
—Libby Ward (@LibbyWard), author of Honest Motherhood
