Invisible Man

I spoke automatically and with such fervor that I did not realize that the men were still talking and laughing until my dry mouth, filling up with blood from the cut, almost strangled me. I coughed, wanting to stop and go to one of the tall brass, sand-filled spittoons to relieve myself, but a few of the men, especially the superintendent, were listening and I was afraid. So I gulped it down, blood, saliva and all, and continued. (What powers of endurance I had during those days! What enthusiasm! What a belief in the rightness of things!) I spoke even louder in spite of the pain. But still they talked and still they laughed, as though deaf with cotton in dirty ears. So I spoke with greater emotional emphasis. I closed my ears and swallowed blood until I was nauseated. The speech seemed a hundred times as long as before, but I could not leave out a single word. All had to be said, each memorized nuance considered, rendered. Nor was that all. Whenever I uttered a word of three or more syllables a group of voices would yell for me to repeat it. I used the phrase 'social responsibility' and they yelled:

'What's that word you say, boy?'

'Social responsibility,' I said.

'What?'

'Social...'

'Louder.'

'... responsibility.'

'More!'

'Respon-'

'Repeat!'

'-sibility.'

The room filled with the uproar of laughter until, no doubt distracted by having to gulp down my blood, I made a mistake and yelled a phrase I had often seen denounced in newspaper editorials, heard debated in private.

'Social...'

'What?' they yelled.

'... equality-'

The laughter hung smokelike in the sudden stillness. I opened my eyes, puzzled. Sounds of displeasure filled the room. The M.C. rushed forward. They shouted hostile phrases at me. But I did not understand.

A small dry mustached man in the front row blared out, 'Say that slowly, son!'

'What, sir?'

'What you just said!'

'Social responsibility, sir,' I said.

'You weren't being smart, were you, boy?' he said, not unkindly.

'No, sir!'

'You sure that about 'equality' was a mistake?'

'Oh, yes, sir,' I said. 'I was swallowing blood.'

'Well you had better speak more slowly so we can understand. We mean to do right by you, but you've got to know your places at all times. All right, now, go on with your speech.'

I was afraid. I wanted to leave but I wanted also to speak and I was afraid they'd snatch me down.

'Thank you, sir,' I said, beginning where I had left off, and having them ignore me as before.

Yet when I finished there was a thunderous applause.