Acknowledgments xiii
Foreword xv
Rabbi Jeffrey K. Salkin
Preface xix
Rabbi Julie Gordon
Introduction xxi
Cantor Helen Leneman
Section I: What's Bar/Bat Mitzvah All About? 1
1 Bar/Bat Mitzvah Basic Elements: Start to Finish 3
Cantor Helen Leneman
2 What Parents Should Know Before the Bar/Bat Mitzvah Ceremony 15
Susie Tatarka
3 "Passing" the Bar (or Bat) Mitzvah: Setting Clear and Realistic Expectations for Everyone 21
Cantor Marshall Portnoy
4 A Guide for the Perplexed Parent: How to Ask the Right Questions about Preparation 33
Cantor Helen Leneman
5 The Parents' Rite of Passage 43
Rabbi Susan B. Stone
6 Ritual Magic and Family Drama: Finding New Meaning in an Old Story 47
Dr. Judith Davis
7 To a Religiously Skeptical Jewish Parent 57
Rabbi Jeffrey K. Salkin
Section II: The Family's Perspective 65
8 Tales from the Home Front: Lessons from Family Experiences 67
Cantor Helen Leneman
9 Reflections of a Mother 77
Missy Cohen Lavintman
10 Reflections of a Father 83
Neal Gendler
11 Post B'nai Mitzvah Thoughts: Teens Reflect 89
Norman Lavintman, Maya Jaffe, Jennifer Greenberg, Miriam White
12 The Bat Mitzvah Dress: An Intergenerational Story 97
Dr. Nechama Liss-Levinson
13 Journey of One Interfaith Family 103
Dr. Donna R. Hart
14 What to Say to Your Child on the Bimah 109
Rabbi Sandy Eisenberg Sasso
Section III: Essentials and Options for the Service and the Celebration 119
15 Designing a Creative Service 121
Cantor Helen Leneman
16 Celebrating and Negotiating: Avoiding a Post-Divorce Battle on the Bimah 129
Sally Weber
17 Making the Theme Meaningful 139
Rabbi Aaron Bergman
18 Do You Need a Party Planner? 145
Cantor Helen Leneman
19 Coming of Age: The Significance of Bar/Bat Mitzvah for Interfaith Families 151
Joan C. Hawxhurst
20 Celebrating Bar/Bat Mitzvah Successfully as an Interfaith Family 155
Lena Romanoff
21 Special Needs Children Speak for Themselves 161
Appendix A: On the Learning Path-Selected Resources for Parents 171
Dr. Barbara Wachs z"l Cantor Helen Leneman
Appendix B: Shabbat Morning Service Outline 181
Cantor Marshall Portnoy
Appendix C: Helpful Hints for Parents of Special Needs Children 83
Beverly Weaver
Appendix D: Selected Bibliography: Recommended Sources for English Readings 187
Cantor Helen Leneman
Glossary 189
About the Contributors 193
