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When A Parent Has Cancer : A Guide To Caring For Your Children - Wendy Schlessel Harpham

When A Parent Has Cancer

A Guide To Caring For Your Children

Paperback

Published: 21st September 2004
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At some point in our lives, many of us will face the crisis of an unexpected illness. For parents, the fear, anxiety and confusion resulting from a cancer diagnosis can be particularly devastating.

"When A Parent Has Cancer" is a book for families written from the heart of experience. A mother, physician, and cancer survivor, Dr Wendy Harpham offers clear, direct, and sympathetic advice for parents challenged with the task of raising normal, healthy children while they struggle with a potentially life-threatening disease.

Dr Harpham lays the groundwork of her book with specific plans for helping children through the upheaval of a parent's diagnosis and treatment, remission and recovery, and if necessary, confronting the possibility of death. She emphasises the importance of being honest with children about the gravity of the illness, while assuring them that their basic needs will always be met.

Included is "Becky and the Worry Cup," an illustrated children's book that tells the story of a seven-year-old girl's experiences with her mother's cancer.

Acknowledgmentsp. xiii
Important Message to Parents, Friends, and Extended Familyp. xvii
Prologue: Our Storyp. xxi
How to Use Becky and the Worry Cupp. xxxiii
Meeting Your Children's Fundamental Needsp. 1
Turning Problems into Strengthsp. 1
Establishing Open Communicationp. 4
Understanding Children's Fundamental Needsp. 5
Telling the Truthp. 7
When Advice from Others Seems Intrusive or Annoyingp. 10
Perfect Parenting Is an Illusionp. 13
Caring for Your Children Through the Crisis of a New Diagnosisp. 15
Breaking the Newsp. 15
Teaching Children That Cancer Is Not Contagiousp. 19
Preparing Children for Changes in a Life-Enhancing Wayp. 21
Empowering Childrenp. 25
Caring for Your Children Beyond the First Few Weeksp. 29
Learning to Recognize Choices That Are "None of the Above"p. 29
Helping Children Through Unpleasant Changesp. 31
Sorting Out Prioritiesp. 33
Creating an "Energy Bank Account"p. 35
When Children's Needs Are Not Metp. 36
Knowing How Much Detail to Tell Childrenp. 37
Providing a Framework for Dealing with the Changesp. 40
Children Experience Stress Differently Than Adultsp. 42
Understanding Children's Questionsp. 47
Protecting Children's Need for Normalcyp. 48
When Cancer Seems to Be the Only Focus of Attentionp. 49
Handling the Crisesp. 52
Family Meetingsp. 54
Doing What Feels Right for Your Familyp. 56
Grief, Fear, and Children's Other Emotionsp. 59
Dealing with Loss and Griefp. 59
Dealing with Fearp. 62
Helping Children Work through Negative Emotionsp. 65
After a Bad Dayp. 70
Using Play as a Therapeutic Toolp. 71
When Laughter Can Be Healing Medicinep. 72
Dealing with Regression and Failurep. 73
Knowing Whether Children Are Doing OKp. 76
Helping Your Children Live with Uncertainty and Tame Their Fear of Deathp. 79
Dealing with Uncertainty and Faithp. 79
Dealing with the Possibility of Recurrent Cancerp. 82
Helping Children Face Their Fear of Deathp. 85
Knowing If You Are Dying Nowp. 87
Understanding Children's Conception of Deathp. 88
Breaking the News of a Poor Prognosisp. 89
Matching Your Degree of Optimism with the Factsp. 94
Preparing Children for Your Deathp. 96
Family Members with Special Needs: Teenagers, Single Parents, the Well Spousep. 101
Caring for Teenagersp. 101
Understanding Issues Common to Teens and Youngstersp. 101
Understanding Issues Common to Teens and Adultsp. 104
Helping Teens Stay Connected to Their Friendsp. 106
Understanding Issues Unique to Teens: Drugs, Alcohol, Sexuality, and Dangerous Behaviorsp. 108
Helping Teens Sort Out Conflicting Loyaltiesp. 111
Teens and Financesp. 113
Caring for Children in a Single-Parent Home or When the Parents' Marriage Is Unstablep. 114
Unstable Marriagesp. 114
Special Issues of Single-Parent Homesp. 116
Caring for the Well Spousep. 119
Taking Care of Youp. 129
Caring for the Children When Cancer Recurs or Becomes a Chronic Diseasep. 139
Facing Recurrence-the Patientp. 140
Facing Recurrence-the Well Spousep. 143
Facing Recurrence-the Childrenp. 146
The Truth Pactp. 150
Your Children's Needs This Time Aroundp. 152
Living with Chronic Cancerp. 154
Creating a "New Normal"p. 156
Problems: Cancer-Related or Other-Related?p. 157
Choosing Your Battlesp. 158
Avoiding Pityp. 158
Expecting vs. Hopingp. 161
Rituals and Routinesp. 163
Finding Joyp. 164
Preventing Burnoutp. 165
Conclusionp. 171
Major Stages of Growth and Developmentp. 175
Glossary for Kidsp. 179
Resources for Parents and Childrenp. 189
Annotated Bibliographyp. 195
Table of Contents provided by Rittenhouse. All Rights Reserved.

ISBN: 9780060740818
ISBN-10: 0060740817
Audience: General
Format: Paperback
Language: English
Number Of Pages: 240
Published: 21st September 2004
Publisher: HarperCollins Publishers Inc
Country of Publication: US
Dimensions (cm): 22.2 x 15.7  x 1.9
Weight (kg): 0.33