Healing starts the moment you feel heard.
This is part of my abortion story and journey of healing. Along with my husband, Peter, sharing from a male perspective, which is often not heard.
I am not a counsellor, but someone with certain life experiences which has shaped me into the person I am today.
I did, however, train in Mental Health and did some community papers, which have given an added insight into the effects abortion can have on a person's emotional and physical wellbeing.
Through my own journey and hearing from many other post abortive women, the realisation of what we have done may hit within days of the termination, months or not come for many years. Realising that for many of us, the periods of depression, anxiety and unﬁ llable void within, can often link back to the abortion.
Many post abortive women are struggling alone with their pain and just waiting for the right person to hear her story. Someone who understands what she's going through and someone who will not condemn her or minimise what has happened.
Our hope is that sharing some of our story, will not only help others on their journey of healing, but also help those that ﬁnd themselves with an unplanned pregnancy and are going through life-changing decision making. That people will be fully informed and know of all support options available to them.
Walk gently in people's lives, as you never know what they have been through, or going through at this very moment and they are just waiting for the right person to hear their story -- Marina Young
"I am so grateful to both Marina and Peter for opening up their lives and experience in order that others might hear about the reality of abortion and its effect on women, men, marriages, families, and ultimately, society. This resource speaks truth, and as we know from the Gospel of John, "the truth will set you free." Please read this book - and then share it! Choose life."
Bob McCoskrie, National Director, Family First NZ www.familyfirst.org.nz
"Unforgotten Babies is the story behind the Buttons Project. A personal story of two people; Marina and Peter Young. Nothing speaks louder than personal experiences and when it comes to the experience
of abortion, we know that it takes courage to share
In reading the booklet, I appreciated the authors' owning and heartfelt expressions of the reality of what happened and what it has meant. What stands out is how abortion is never an isolated event. It happens in the context of each individual's personal history, and the circumstances at the time of the pregnancy as perceived and experienced by each person, and the partnership. This creates an often complex web of influence which plays out over time for two souls genuinely seeking a good outcome to what is a difficult and problematic situation filled with conflict and emotion.
It is often underestimated how much an abortion experience can impact and alter a person. This booklet describes clearly how an abortion can be significant and the effects lasting and widespread. I was deeply struck by Marina's attitude, as an adult mother herself, to her mum, which was aptly reflected in the quote she shared: "Before you start to judge me, step into my shoes and walk the life I'm living, and if you get as far as I am, just maybe you will see how strong I really am."
Also I was moved deeply by Peter's admission of the change in him afterwards. "I realised I needed healing... to acknowledge my failings, admitting my mistakes and seeking... forgiveness." That philosophy, understanding and respect is now demonstrated in Marina and Peter's work with the Buttons Project, where they are able to use their own abortion experience to reach out and support others on their journey of healing. They offer Christ-like love and acceptance in meeting others who are struggling with the loss and trauma of a recent or past experience. And the buttons being collected signify that each life mattered, which is hugely powerful, as abortion remains such a disenfranchised loss.
Thank you Marina and Peter for your willingness to be open about how abortion touched and changed each of you, and you as a couple. I sincerely hope that in reading your booklet, others with similar experiences will feel that they are not alone, and can find hope as you have done. May you be richly blessed as you bless others with the Buttons Project."
Carolina Gnad, Founder & Co-ordinator of Education & Training
P.A.T.H.S. (Post Abortion Trauma Healing Service)