In our culture we demand a great deal from our intimate relationships—and we are often disappointed.
This book not only reveals the social and psychological factors that lead to marital unhappiness, but also offers guidelines for change. Solomon starts by uncovering certain pervasive narcissistic myths and exploring what it means to be intimate in a culture that values autonomy and self-fulfillment above all. She shows that experiences in early childhood can lead to narcissistic vulnerability in later relationships.
Case examples from her practice clarify how two individuals' feeling states and defenses mesh in the marital system and how the attempt to defend against emotional injury creates barriers to intimacy. The second part of the book focuses on treatment and on ways to change.
About the Author
Marion Solomon, Ph.D., is a lecturer at the David Geffen School of Medicine, Department of Psychiatry at UCLA, and Senior Extension faculty at the Department of Humanities, Sciences and Social Sciences at UCLA. She is also director of clinical training at the Lifespan Learning Institute and author of Narcissism and Intimacy, co-author of Short Term Therapy For Long Term Change, and co-editor of Countertransference in Couples Therapy and Healing Trauma.
Marion Solomon's wisdom and warm humanity, together with her wide understanding and successful integration of systems ideas with both American mainstream and British object relations psychoanalytic thought and technique, make this book vital reading for all those concerned with the restoration and improvement of couple relationships in this 'age of confusion.' Her elegant style and her ability to present complex issues in simple language without 'writing down' make it a pleasure to read. I recommend it heartily. --A. C. Robin Skynner, M.D., The Group-Analytic Practice, London"