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Little Girls Can be Mean : Four Steps to Bully-Proof Girls in the Early Grades - Michelle Anthony

Little Girls Can be Mean

Four Steps to Bully-Proof Girls in the Early Grades

Paperback Published: 17th August 2010
ISBN: 9780312615529
Number Of Pages: 282
For Ages: 18+ years old

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Worried about mean girls? Help your daughter respond and react to bullying where it starts—-in elementary school

As experts in developmental psychology and each a mother of three, Dr. Michelle Anthony and Dr. Reyna Lindert began noticing an alarming pattern of social struggle among girls as young as five, including their own daughters. In today’s world, it is likely that your daughter has been faced with bullying and friendship issues, too—-and perhaps you’re at a loss for how to guide her through these situations effectively. Little Girls Can Be Mean is the first book to tackle the unique social struggles of elementary-aged girls, giving you the tools you need to help your daughter become stronger, happier, and better able to enjoy her friendships at school and beyond.

Dr. Anthony and Dr. Lindert offer an easy-to-follow, 4-step plan to help you become a problem-solving partner with your child, including tips and insights that girls can use on their own to confront social difficulties in an empowered way. Whether your daughter is just starting grade school or is already on her way to junior high, you’ll learn how to:

OBSERVE the social situation with new eyes CONNECT with your child in a new way GUIDE your child with simple, compassionate strategies SUPPORT your daughter to act more independently to face the social issue

By focusing squarely on the issues and needs of girls in the years before adolescence, Little Girls Can Be Mean is the essential, go-to guide for any parent or educator of girls in grades K-6.

About the Authors

Dr. Michelle Anthony, an expert in developmental psychology, is mother to three young children, two girls and a boy. She is a certified K-3 teacher and president and cofounder of Wide-Eyed Learning, a company devoted to facilitating communication and learning between parents and children. She is also a columnist for Scholastic’s Parent and Child magazine. Dr. Anthony holds a B.A. in Education from Brown University, an M.A. in child studies from Tufts University, and a Ph.D. in developmental psychology from University of California at Berkeley. She lives in Centennial, Colorado.

Dr. Reyna Lindert, also an expert in developmental psychology, is mother to three young children, two girls and a boy. She is a certified parent educator and vice president and cofounder of Wide-Eyed Learning. She holds a B.S. in human development and family studies from Cornell University, and an M.A. and Ph.D. in developmental psychology from University of California at Berkeley. She lives in Beaverton, Oregon.


Finding this book very helpful


Have begun using some of the suggestions in this book with some great success so far

Victoria aus


Little Girls Can Be Mean

5.0 1


"More than ever, young girls are facing painful social challenges that require real skills to respond...offers useful strategies and tools to help parents empower their daughters from the earliest ages." --Rachel Simmons, bestselling author of Odd Girl Out and The Curse of the Good Girl

"A valuable guide for understanding and demystifying the friendship issues, social cruelty, and bullying of elementary-aged girls. A must-have book for parents, counselors, and educators." --Rosalind Wiseman, bestselling author of Queen Bees and Wannabes

"From clinical studies to mainstream media, the problem of girl aggression has been the subject of growing concern, but most of the recent focus has been on middle- and high-school students, not on elementary-school girls. That's part of the problem, argue the authors of this reassuring guide, which offers practical tips and personal anecdotes aimed at alleviating female "relational aggression" in the critical early grades. In each chapter, the authors, both developmental psychologists, illustrate how adults can guide girls through a four-step process to identify and deal with tough social situations. Throughout, boxed activities for educators, parents, and girls themselves give the tide a highly interactive, proactive feel, and an appended section suggests ways that adults can apply the same techniques to their own lives. More than just invaluable advice about preparing girls to cope with bullying, gossip, and friendship riffs, these are empowering strategies for adults to communicate and connect with their daughters while they are at a highly receptive age and to help them develop resilient self-esteem before they hit the middle-school jungle." --Booklist

Acknowledgments xiii

A Note to Readers xvii

About the Authors xix

I Laying the Foundation: The Four-Step Approach

1 The Rise of Social Cruelty 3

2 How Can I Help My Daughter or Student? 24

What Is Bullying? 26

Building the Foundation 28

Facing Tough Situations 29

Following the Four-Step Plan 30

Step 1 Observe 32

Step 2 Connect 34

Step 3 Guide 40

Step 4 Support to Act 44

Integrating the Four Steps 50

How Long Will This All Take? 52

3 Think, Share, Do…Activity Bank for Part I 54

Step 1 Observe 56

Step 2 Connect 58

Step 3 Guide 62

Step 4 Support to Act 68

II The Heart of the Matter: Applying the Four Steps to Real Situations Faced by Real Girls

4 Side by Side: Best Friends, Worst Enemies 77

Dealing with a Turf War 78

When Best Friends Pull Away 93

Yo-Yo Friendships 106

5 Going Along with the Gang 125

When Girls Struggle to Fit In 126

When Girls Struggle with Feeling "Different" 138

When Girls Struggle with Going Along with the Group 150

When the Group Turns Against Your Child 162

6 All Girls Can Be Mean: When Your Daughter Is Acting Like a Mean Girl 179

There Are Two Sides to Every Story 180

The Power Rush of Popularity 195

When Girls Struggle with Following the Group 211

7 Think, Share, Do…Activity Bank for Part II 229

Step 1 Observe 229

Step 2 Connect 232

Step 3 Guide 235

Step 4 Support to Act 241

III Wrapping Up: Using the Four Steps in Your Home, School, or Office

The Difference Between "Younger" and "Older" Girls 256

Facing All Kinds of Issues, Together 259

She Is Not Alone 262


1 Bully Stories for Home or School 265

2 "What-If" Scenarios 267

3 Activities That Follow the Four Steps 269

Teacher Tips 269

Tips for Girls 271

Think, Share, Do… 272

Notes 273

Index 275

ISBN: 9780312615529
ISBN-10: 0312615523
Audience: General
For Ages: 18+ years old
Format: Paperback
Language: English
Number Of Pages: 282
Published: 17th August 2010
Country of Publication: US
Dimensions (cm): 20.88 x 14.15  x 2.06
Weight (kg): 0.27