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Courage To Grieve - Judy Tatelbaum

Courage To Grieve

By: Judy Tatelbaum

Paperback | 12 July 1993 | Edition Number 1

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Expert advice on how to cope with loss and bereavement

Profound loss and disappointment are emotions that each of us will experience at some point in our lives. Loss is one of the most difficult experiences to come to terms with. The Courage to Grieve explores how we can deal with every kind of grief, revealing-

- How grief manifests itself in many ways, ranging from anguish, exhaustion, emptiness, resentment, longing, tension, confusion, sleeplessness and sometimes the temporary loss of the will to live.
- How we can help ourselves and others to cope with the immediate experience of death and the grief and mourning period that follows.
- How children and adults cope with grief in different ways.
- What we should do mentally and physically to prepare ourselves for loss and bereavement.
- How grief can transform our lives in unexpected ways, encouraging joys and growth.

The Courage to Grieve offers spiritual, optimistic, creative, and practical guidance and shows us how to live with courage, not fearing death.
Industry Reviews
A Gestalt therapist takes a stab at grief: no sparks, but some quiet ruminative moments for those so inclined. Unlike Kubler-Ross, Tatelbaum recognizes only three stages of grief: shock or numbness (a natural self-protection against overwhelming feelings); suffering and disorganization (the longest and most crucial stage, where we risk becoming bogged down in guilt, unacceptable anger, etc.); and a period of reorganization on our way to resolution (or "finishing"). Where our abilities to confront the pain directly are limited, so are our chances for recovery; Tatelbaum discusses the toll of "unsuccessful" grief, the need to go over and over images and feelings about the deceased until we can let go of them. In extreme cases, she would have us try the Gestalt hallmark: a direct, chair-to-chair dramatized encounter with the loved one who has gone, wherein we vocalize all the things ("unfinished business") we never got a chance to state before (e.g., anger at abandonment, or simply "good-bye"). Though this will never dazzle with its depth ("The best solution for unsuccessful grief. . . is to resolve the grief as fully as possible"), it's a low-key treatment that may soothe effectively. (Kirkus Reviews)

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